Part 3:
Socks & Tights
If you were to cast your mind back… oooh, say, to February, then 
you may remember reading Part 2 of a series of 3 blog posts on Foundations and have been eagerly anticipating the third… Yes, I knew it! Well, here it is at long last. Having paid too much attention to balancing cherries atop a partially baked pastry shell I find myself here, 3 months later, writing the last in this series – oooh, it sounds so fancy! – lying in a pool of jam amongst pie debris, all too familiar with what happens when your foundations are flimsy.
If I’d heeded the warnings emanating from my wardrobe, I may have realised that the Norah
Sock of doom
Batty-esque wrinkling of my over the knee socks was a harbinger of foundation doom. I mean, if the the actual look of flagging footwear isn’t bad enough, it’s the feel of it sliding slowly down your leg – a kind of creeping sensation I imagine they are referring to in vintage horror films when they say, ‘Oooh, that ghastly face at the window really gave me the creeps’.
Speaking of which, hosiery meets eco-horror in this spoof film, The Sockfather – Part 1 …
As this film demonstrates the humble sock can be environmentally devastating. But like most things, it’s not the socks that ruin the environment its the feet that wear them – leaving their carbon footprints all over Mother Nature’s clean floor, tut. However the sock, like the brief, is now available in a range of eco-friendly materials, notably lenpur and bamboo, which are breathable and deodorising – phew.
Obviously comfortable, well-fitting, hosiery should never be underestimated, but I also have certain style prerequisites: I like a long sock, in either a black or ‘natural’ shade, all the better to hide that flash of fuzzy, white,
A good sock is hard to find
bruised flesh when your trouser hems ride up as you sit down. However finding eco or ethical hose which reaches my standards has proved perplexing. Boots has a pretty good range of basic green black socks and tights, but for the longer length I desire I’ve had to trawl the net, and at last I’ve found G=9.8 which are made from the aforementioned lenpur – tree cellulose no less.
All well and good except eco-friendly tan tights / stockings / pop socks – yes, the most unsexy footwear known to woman after orthopaedic sandals, but a necessary wardrobe evil, I find – is still proving as elusive as the Scarlet Pimpernel. So until I discover such an item I am going on with the regular ones and endeavouring to find ways to re-use them. Having rejected the bank robber’s mask as too cliched, I was really at a loss as to how else to re-use my hole-y hose. But then I came across this little gem: why not turn your tights into a necklace? It just goes to show that off the right feet and in the right hands anything can be transformed into treasure…
Adventuress Undressed 